As I’m sure everyone finds, cycles of time come and go in life and how we choose to spend that time determines everything we get involved in. For the last few months I’ve shifted much of my free time either to work on renovations and home improvements since moving or I’ve put my time in working for clients in my 3D business.  That need will likely continue and when I do make time to spend on my blog much of it makes me realize just how much there is to learn in running a blog. This article summarizes 3 important areas I’ve learned the most about from blogging!

The People Factor

This is definitely the one I like the most about blogging.  Having discussions with people and developing connections and friendships online is definitely a great value.  I’m afraid that many people get into blogging for themselves and so don’t ever spend much time interacting with or even trying to get to know other people through their blog.  I love this part of blogging and knowing there are friends who support me and who have similar thoughts and experiences that visit my blog (and I theirs) on a regular basis.  This itself is a huge encouragement which makes the time spent feel so much more valuable.  I only wish and hope that I’ll be able to meet in person some of the people I feel like I know so well online.  It’s incredible how revealing blogging can be and a person can definitely get to know another person quickly when they share a lot of their thoughts and backgrounds on important subjects.  I find this especially true for personal development blogs since the subject is so often rooted in underlying beliefs, morals and life principles, you find out quickly what matters to a person and yourself and talk about those items.  If only we could have those conversations with everyone we meet in our work and day to day interactions, image how much quicker we would get to know people.

Online Marketing

Online marketing and promotion is another huge area for learning as a blogger.  I definitely knew a few things about online marketing before I got into blogging from operating my own online freelance graphics business but I never ventured into nearly as much marketing and promotion as I did once I got into blogging. I knew a bit about web design and HTML coding but knew little about all the variety of things you find in a marketing glossary. Words like SEO, adsense, click fraud, CTR, CPC, affiliate marketing, conversions, page rank, social media, and literally hundreds of other words for marketing your content and site I’ve learned as I’ve explored this vast world of online marketing.  I will say however that while all this learning has occurred naturally as I’ve been reading and involved with other bloggers in their own search for learning to market their content better and better.

Not only has this helped me with my blog, but also my business websites and my day job also gets the benefit of my knowledge now put to use for new online marketing programs that had never before existed.  I’m confident this media will only continue to expand so there is definitely value in knowing how to use it effectively for your business and personal life.  There is much more to learn and it seems to ever be evolving, the perfect recipe for someone who doesn’t ever want to stop learning!  Ha!

Learning from the Content

Written content is continually valuable for yourself and others as reference material.  I find myself referring to articles and series I wrote quite a while ago now very often and they are always valuable to me to pass along to people asking about those subjects.  I’m constantly surprised by how much shear volume of content that accumulates from blogging and how useful it can be in a variety of situations.

The other great thing to be learned from the content is in writing it itself.  I write about subjects I am interested in but I certainly don’t only pick subjects I already know about.  I go out and research my topics, I read books and articles to gain some insight and varying perspectives on the subject and then I write my own version and opinions on the subject based on what I’ve learned and experienced about it.  Sometimes this is over the course of years or even my whole lifetime and sometimes it’s over the course of a few hours.  There is something I learn, reinforce or realize every time I write any new content.

Kaleidoscope Relationships List

I received a message from Priscilla of Priscillamcintire.com introducing me to this list and was pleased to see myself among such a great list of personal development authors.  The idea behind promoting this list is to add personal connections to bloggers who deserve to be on this list since they use relationships in their blogging.  Well, I think that is really cool and am honored to be on the list.

From Prescilla’s Site:

No one achieves success without the help and support of other people. The book “Personal Development Kaleidoscope”, is a demonstration of the power of connection in action. The Kaleidoscope Relationships List began with only a list of the authors and their web-sites. These authors were eached asked to publish the list on their site, and to add 5-10 people who they feel use or have used the principles taught in this book effectively.

In order to increase the power of our relationships, we are asking those of you who have been added to the list to continue the process. Please post this list on your own site, then add people who you feel are effectively using the power of relationships to increase their own success, as well as, the success of others. Then email Priscilla at relationships@priscillamcintire.com

My Additions to the List

These are the people I communicate often with and definitely value the relationships with that I don’t yet see on the list.  I’ve already emailed each of your sites to Priscilla so I hope to see you added to the list.

Armen Shirvanian (Timeless Information)

Bunny (BunnyGotBlog)

Dragos Roua (dragosroua.com)

Steve Borgman (Success Factors)

Stephen (Balanced Existence)

Alik Levin (PracticeThis.com)

Arswino (Inspiration & Motivation Blog)

Ian (Quantum Learning)

Daphne (Joyful Days)

Lance (Jungle of Life)

Stephen (Rat Race Trap)

The List

Abu Aremu        Positive Self Talk Guide

Adam Kayce       Monk at Work

Adebola Oni      Naija Motivation

Al Ramsey         7pproductions.com

Alex Shalman     Practical Personal Development

Angela Lord at     Angelalord.com

Arthur Hung & Jason Fonceca     Spiritentient

Cheryl Ragsdale     That Girl Is Funny

Chris Cade Think without the box

Chris Marshall     Martial Development

CK Reyes           My Coaching Works

Cinderella S Kelley Kroh   The Krohs Nest

Cindie Wilding   Answers From Within

Corrinne Edwards  Personal Growth with Corinne Edwards

Craig Harper     Motivational Speaker – Craig Harper

Crystal Silver    CrystalSilver.com

Daniel Sitter       Idea Sellers

David Rogers     How to Have Great Self Confidence

David Zinger     David Zinger Associates

Dawn Edwards     Second Hand Roses

Dawna Jones      Management-Issues

Diane Brandon     Diane Brandon.com and Diane Brandon.net

Dr. Susan R. Meyer, Ed. D.   Life Work Cafe

Dr. Venerina Conti    VenerinaConti.com

El Baugher at Thesmilingspirit.com

Ellie Walsh at     Living the Law of Attraction

Frank Butterfield     Life Unfolding Beautifully and 68 Second Videos and Re/Transformation

Gamy Rachel     Mind Think Success

Gary Evans     Good To Feel Good

Gleb Reys        Personal Development Ideas

Gordie Rogers     Lifestyle Design 4U

Gregory Allen Butler     holistic-personal-development.com

Heather Bestel a little bit of me time

Henrik Edberg The Positivity Blog

Isabella Mori      MoriTherapy

Jacklyn Ker     Inspiring and Empowing Lives

Jeanette Maw     Good Vibe Coaching

Jeanne May        Goals and Aspirations

Jeff ‘Yoopersmith’ Smith    Shift-Your-Consciousness

Jennifer Mannion   JennyMannion.com

John Sadler      Bitesize Marketing NLP

Jonathan Fields    Awake At the Wheel

Jonathan Wells      Advanced Life Skills

Jordan Rosenfeld     Make a Scene

Judy Kinney      Dream and Flourish

Judy Martin       The Work/Life Monitor

Justin Wolsey Riggs     Easier Method

Kaya Singer     Awakening Business

Karen Putz     A Deaf Mom Shares Her World

Lexi Sundell     Energies of Creation

Liz Strauss     Successful Blog

Lori Painter at      Inspire2act

Lorraine Cohen     Powerfull Living

Lyman Reed     Free Personal Development Material

Lynn Solarczyk     Livingloa

Luciano Passuello     Litemind.com

M. Farouk Radwan     2knowmyself

Mel Kaye     Monday Morning Power

Melissa Goerke      Melissa Thinks Out Loud

Marelisa Fábrega     Abundance Blog at Marelisa Online

Meryl K. Evans     Meryl.net

Michele Woodward     Lifeframeworks.com

Michelle Vandepas     Conscious Destiny

Mike King Learn This

Mohammad Shafi’e     Ultimate Secrets of Success

Neil Sattin     NeilSattin.com and Natural Dog Blog

Patricia Schiavone     Thriving Together, AtoZEdit.com and Attracting The Best

Patricia Singleton     Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker

Phil Gerbyshak     PhilGerbyshak.com

Priscilla McIntire at    Personal Development Demands Success

Rachel Rofe at      Rachelrofe.com

Rahul Bhambhani    Take-20.com

Robert Henru       Reason4Smile

Robert Higginson    Robert Higginson

Robin Skeen     Robin?s Reflections

Rod Smith      Difficult Relationships

Sam Kotadia     MindSportLive.com

Scott Ginsberg     Hello, My Name Is Blog

Scott H Young    Scotthyoung.com

Sharani Robins     Sharani Girl on a Road

Sherri Joubert       Being The Change I Wish To see

Shauna Arthurs     Follow Your Path and Breathing Prosperity

Slade Roberson     Shift Your Spirits

Sonia Simone       Remarkable Communication

Steven Aitchison    Change Your Thoughts

Sugandi Iyer     Life Business Creations

Thea Westra     MyForwardsteps.com and TimeForMyLife.com

Tina Su     Think Simple Now

Todd Goldfarb     We The Change

Vincent Tan      Health Money Success
Vivienne Quek      Versa Creations

Zorka Hereford     Essential Life Skills

Zubli Zainordin     Your Wisdom of Total Happiness

For many people, things they do at work seem to come quite naturally in their work but not so much in their personal lives. Especially when it comes to planning and seeing the power of a plan.  There is certainly power in having a plan for yourself, your life, your family, your health, your relationships and the hobbies you take on. Perhaps a plan for the way you are involved with your friends, family, neighbors, colleagues. What about using a plan for ensuring you get what is truly most important to you in your life? What about a plan that ensure you stay on track and that your plan is really what you want it to be? Many people I know in my work can easily formulate a plan for some project or set of complex tasks in their job tasks yet they don’t connect the same value when they think about things in their personal lives.

There is More to Life Than Work

Even without getting to the point of how people work too much, I want to highlight the fact that the important things in life include many areas outside your work. I continually hear people say things like work most important since it is a third of your life, which is a HUGE exaggeration! Even working for 50 years in life, a 40 hour work week equates only to a complete total of 12.5 years in an average life of 75 years which is less than 17% of one’s total life. Close to 33% is spent sleeping and so that leaves 50% of life in other areas.  Everything else fits in there from birth to death.  50% of all your living hours are up to you and your family for how they are spent and many people don’t think that’s worth planning!!  That’s crazy!

Categories for Planning Life

Life has so many areas to explore and those areas deserve the same kind of thoughts and planning as work does.  Categories I use to look at specific goal setting and life planning are:

• Relationships
• Spiritual
• Health
• Emotions
• Things
• Financial
• Career

Your categories might be different but ensure you think big picture when your making life plans.  Think about everything that you value and what you wouldn’t want to live without and ensure those areas are covered in your plans.  Think about what matters if this was your last day on earth or if you knew you had only a week to live.  What would you do?  With who?  How would you want to be remembered?  Are these your passions in life now or are you still searching for your purpose and passions in life?

Write it Down

Did you know that only about 4% of people write out their goals and plans for life?  Its true and its scary when you think about it.  There are so many people living life without a written plan. Are you one of them?  Writing down your goals and plans solidifies it, puts added committment to it and makes it something much more real than just a thought or idea.  It gives the plan real substance and provides a way to review it and visualize it.  The power of a plan extends far beyond work in all areas of life and only if its written down will it have even a chance of being realized.

What’s In A Plan

The content of the plan is where the real thought has to go.  You can’t make a plan without some careful time thinking and trying to understand how you want things to proceed.  This is true in day to day jobs and its true in life as well.  The only thing you can do well without a plan are things you’ve done over and over, and learned to do them naturally.  These may be things you need to do but for most people, the natural actions are not the things we wish we were doing in life, or the things we want to change or learn to do.  For most people, learning new things is a challenge and we all have ideas of what we wish we were better at, doing more of or doing differently in our lives.  This requires change and repeating what we’ve always done (since that is what happens without a plan) definitely won’t lead to that change.  Look for the things that matter to you in each of the categories above.  Don’t settle for what you have, ask yourself why that matters or what will you ultimately gain if you accomplish it to drive out the real reasons behind each item.  You should be able to justify true meaning to all your plans and know that they fit into your life’s purpose.  If you don’t know what that is, then clearly you need more planning, not less which unfortunately many people do when first being frustrated about questions of purpose.  Look for the things that impact others and how others impact you, that’s an easy place to start because we all form opinions of what that ought to look like.

Let Your Plan Change

Plans are much easier if you leave some room to grow it and change it.  Its unlikely that one plan will last many years and you need to adjust it as you learn more about what matters to you. If and how your purpose changes should also spark you to revisit your plan.  It is something you need to refer to often and there is nothing wrong with changing it as life changes.  The more often you look at a plan and change it the easier you can adjust to new circumstances and still ensure you are ultimately on track with the big picture goals and results for that plan.  Also, revisiting a plan lets you avoid complacency as you accomplish the things on it.  Don’t stagnate, instead keep pushing yourself and ensure you add to your plan and let it change as you do to keep you driven with purpose and meaning.

My wish is that everyone I know wrote out their goals and made plans for their life with some idea and thinking of what their purpose is with discussions and relationships founded in what is important in each plan.  This would bring happiness to many and I know the power of what could be accomplished if this were true.  I know I won’t be able to get everyone I know to take this challenge on, but everyone I know who has, has seen great results and now also understands the power of a plan.

You may have noticed the lack of updates lately and that is because we’ve moved houses and in doing this, I’ve taken on a significant amount of home improvements and some minor renovations which have been VERY time consuming to complete and finish on my own during a move.  In doing this, its been stressful, a challenge and I’ve had little rest and time to do what I normally do.  However, we’ve completed our move, settled into our new home, sold our old house and have only a few immediate things to finish.

The Pain of Doing Things Yourself

Well there is certainly a lot of pain from the perspective of time, labour and difficulties in doing things yourself as there is really no one to rely on except yourself.  This can be part of the reason to take on a challenge for some, but it is also makes unexpected things much more impactful as there is no one to help get you through it.  My wife and I had lived in our house for 9 years and it was our first house.  We like to credit ourselves that we don’t accumulate too much stuff but after seeing this move and actually have to move everything, I definitely know we still have a lot more than we need and in fact, more than we even want!

There were a few major steps in this move, the first was simply moving to our new house as we bought it with no plans to move very spontaneously (the only house we looked at) and hadn’t even thought about selling our existing home yet at the time.  So, the second step was to sell the current home.  Then finally, the 3rd step was to renovate the new house to have a hair salon since my wife runs her business out of our home.

Moving was the fun step as we cleaned up our belongings, thinned out our junk, packed everything up and got excited about being in the new house.  We rented a 26′ cube van and packed everything in for a one trip move with a couple SUV loads along side.  Thankfully, we had a bunch of friends who helped us move and even though we did it ourselves, it was done in one day and everything moved to the new house successfully.  There was certainly hard labor at stake here and some serious lifting required but all in all, doing this yourself if you have help is the way to go.  We were well prepared with everything in boxes which make loading/unloading a snap.  We unpacked and setup everything in a couple days as we knew we had renovations to focus on so didn’t want to drag this process out.

Step two was the one with much more pain.  Selling the old house.  I had a list of about 30 improvements to make, many urgent before we listed the place and then a number to make as we were packing, moving and listing the house.  I worked every night till 11PM after my day job and in between graphics jobs so didn’t really leave myself much free time (OK, NO free time really).  I spent 2 weeks painting, trimming, fixing, putting up some drywall, dropped ceiling in basement, and many other minor things to prepare to list.  Then we listed the house hoping to sell before we moved out ourselves.  Another pain in this process was then from all the showings that realtors had on our house while living there and trying to finish home improvements.  I can’t tell you how inconvenient that was and I only appreciate having my space in my home and privacy all that much more as a result.  This was one of the biggest realizations from this whole process.  I have a lot of gratitude now for the privacy I do have in my home without having to constantly evacuate, keep everything in pristine shape and be ready to leave or not come home at a moments notice. We moved out and then sold our house a few days later with almost a month of overlap having both houses.  This gave me time to build and move my wife’s salon for her home business.

This final step has the one with really the most committment as there are always a thousand little things do to when you move into a new place to make it feel like your own, but I had limited time to do a renovation and get everything setup.  I had some minor electrical to change (with my dad’s help who is a journeyman electrician) and with nearly any home improvement a small task turns into a bigger own.  Got that sorted out and then started the real labour.  I had carpet to tear out and changes to make to the sub-floor where there was a dropped entry way.  Repainted everything, made the changes to plumbing and electrical and put in a laminate floor.  I’m just finishing the trim and final touches and setting up the salon equipment /cabinets now to polish everything off.

All in all, the pain has mostly been the stress of having fixed timelines, the sheer amount of labour itself, the countless trips off to the hardware store and figuring out how to do home improvements you’ve never done before.  Let alone the strain of being too busy to get together with friends as often as you’d like and the stress that wears away at each other in marriage when things are so hectic!

The Joy of Doing Things Yourself

Now on the other side of the fence, there is a lot of joy in doing things yourself as well despite whatever hardships are encountered. The biggest thing for me personally which has always led me to being a bit of a handy man and home improvement guy is just knowing the work is done well, how its done and then seeing and living with it everyday.  Its very satisfying to do your own home improvements and the sweat and time put into it always feels great once the results are there.

That is the other great thing about doing it yourself, the results.  I don’t do anything partially, when I set my mind to something I do it 100% and I do it well.  My results in my work and in this kind of work at home are no different, I see it done exactly how I want and can be pleased with the results.

Another great thing about doing things yourself is the money you can save.  Moving yourself and doing your own renovations comes at a fraction of the cost of hiring it out.  Moving comes with enough expenses from the house sale itself, let along all the other legal aspects of moving/selling.  Our new house adds to our mortgage of course, but the thousands of dollars in extra expenses I’ve saved from doing these things myself are a satisfying relief on that as well.

And finally, the joy of this that really stands out for me, is the joy of what is learned by doing things yourself.  I’m only a handyman because of what I’ve learned by doing things myself and its enabled me to do more and more of my own work, and to experience the joys of it.  There is always things to learn in taking on a challenge and while during the challenge itself things may not always feel worth it, there are things learned from doing it that last far longer than any of the struggles during.  In part, that is what drives me to put in the time and effort required as I know it will result in so much more and I’ll have learned things I will use again in the future.  Not only skills, but in coping with and handling similar situations or for helping others get through them when their time comes.  All in all, its another experience, story and lesson to draw on in my life and anyone who takes on work themselves would likely say the same.  I know its worth doing and I always love to encourage others to try a little do it yourself (DIY) to make that life experience as well.

Author: Dave Esler and Myra Kruger

How an Underdog Company Defied the Odds,
Won Customers’ Hearts, and Grew It’s Employees into Better People

I was sent an advanced copy of The Pursuit and Something Better and while I generally don’t like to read new books until I’ve had them recommended and ravely reviewed by others first but I’m glad I didn’t wait for this book, its absolutely brilliant! I read it back to back with The Adversity Parodox and both books are now in my definite top 5 for business and personal development books.  The Pursuit of Something Better is a story of a CEO who takes a mediocre company with high turnover to a thriving culture rich customer focused success.  Jack Rooney is that CEO of the company, U.S. Cellular and he comes in with a passion and belief in culture change being the cornerstone of the company’s success and that belief drives new systems and focus that is unstoppable.  There is more story and insight and example in this book than many others combined and it shows what can be done not only from top down, but also in other levels of the organization, your life and individual self improvement so don’t think this is an executive book only, its much more than that!

Rooney comes into U.S. Cellular and introduces a new concept known as the Dynamic Organization (the D.O.) which he lives and breathes by example and immediate sets new standards and expectations that all associates in the company will also start living that DO culture.  He delivers these systems with a proven track record and overcomes significant hurdles along the way.  I found these hurdles and ways they were addressed to be most inspiring as I see the same items in my work and often they feel like impossible roadblocks.  This story and book are proof and guidance to get past that!

So, I found there are 4 main themes to the Dynamic Organization in the book  and I’ll cover some specific things from each in this review.

Culture

This book outlines an impressive transformation that is built upon a new culture for U.S. Cellular, one far from the conventional business wisdom.  The culture is one that shifts toward a customer focused, caring and value based company.  One that seeks motivational leadership, provides impressive personal development systems and engages and expects every employees to contribute to these new cultural initiatives.  Among these deep messages built into the company come a focus to always do the “right” thing and expect that of all its associates, especially its leaders.

Rooney puts many stages of culture change into place and he does so with much resistance, as would be expected, but his systems built over time and prove themselves to be valid in building a better company and all of the culture changes become sought after both internally between departments and regions within U.S. Cellular and eventually outside the company as well. All three areas below are embedded into the culture and the core to making it all work is that this culture is actually what defines the business strategy.  In fact, it IS the business strategy.  Everything that is promoted in the dynamic organization and the culture for it, are actually the business focus to Rooney and all of the systems, decisions, leadership, and financing is put towards these cultural aspects.  This was the most exciting part to me, to see how the success of a company can come by focusing strategy on things that matter to the employees and customers, that things are done with moral leadership and that the company can focus on initiatives that lead to profits, without directly being steered by profits.

Customer Service

The customer deserves the focus and the customer gets priority are also embedded into this Dynamic Organization and it is taken to great extremes in many cases with long term benefits that certainly didn’t seem profitable in any way when first introduced.  Much of these initiatives in the story were created at a time when there was huge growth in the cellular industry and most companies were purely after capturing market share quickly to expand and take advantage of the available growth.  While this mattered to U.S. Cellular, it wasn’t a focus and the customers were treated better than competitors, service was of its highest quality and the company had expectations from every employee that decisions and actions were taken to ensure the customer would benefit as a result.  Many of these things were costly in the short term but they slowly saw the market shifting to recognizing this customer service and the loyalty of their customers grew.  It allowed them expand and ultimately hang on to market share while their competitors were still struggling to capture new markets without a loyal customer base.  The long term benefits of this payed off and the book outlines many of the challenges that were faced in doing this and how this customer focus was created and maintained at U.S. Cellular.

Leadership

None of this great change could happen without great leadership and there are impressive stories and systems employed that can be modeled to help companies build stronger more focused leadership.  The Dynamic Organization expected drastic contributing to the new culture and that was reinforced with regular leadership development and feedback systems.  Peer based feedback systems for all leaders drove much of these expectations and it allowed all associates to identify the desired leadership factors which seemed to enable more and more grass roots leadership.

Ethics

I think the sheer volume of attention put to ethics in the Dynamic Organization was impressive and one of the most inspiring aspects of the book.  It shows how a company can still operate (and do so very successfully) with strong ethical boundaries and expectations.  Business competition often stems unethical behaviors and greed that dominate our news and media channels which is so obvious today.  These kind of stories and examples of doing the right thing no matter what the costs and the way U.S. Cellular put ethical boundaries and expectations into a company’s core culture is something to be honored and admired.

So, I’d highly recommend The Pursuit of Something Better to anyone interested in culture change, leadership, ethics and moral leadership and customer service.  I believe some of these changes can occur at any level of an organization but its especially useful for driving systemic changes and strategic change in your company.  I can’t say the book is really a clear guide of exactly how to do this, but the stories are inspiring and many of the systems and actions are described in detailed and will be easy to use as a model for similar systems in your own company.  I know I can use some of these in mine!

Review: The Shadow Effect

with Debbie Ford

I received a free copy of The Shadow Effect to review and am actually having a tough time reviewing it. The Shadow Effect is about discovering and knowing the so called, “Shadows” in our lives which are the flaws, the bad actions, the painful things, the adversities we’ve faced which we avoid and try to keep secret from the world around us.  Some of these shadows are outlined and they include how we sabotage ourselves of our desires, our feelings, our egos and our persona’s we display.  All these things we hide and reject are buried inside us and we can’t keep them bottled up since it consumes so much energy to do so and it prevents us from allowing our brighter side to truly be revealed with our dark side together.

So, my first reaction was one of disappointment as I was really hoping for something with more of an impact to me and something that I could connect with.  However, that didn’t happen for a number of reasons.  First, the movie just seems to drag on saying the same thing without getting to many real discoveries and it has many old cliches which I found kept me out of the movie’s atmosphere over and over.  The movie presented a number of obvious biases as well.  There are certain media figures used as examples for the dark “shadows” while others are presented as great shining light examples.  I found these examples seemed to pinpoint and promote specific names with media clips while chastising others (I won’t even repeat the names used here) and that turned me off immediately.  It was completely unnecessary for the point in the movie.

Also, many of the examples are described with no real evidence or research, everything is presented as “probably” and “likely” this person that or that person must have done “this” at some time in their life.  These are not examples of the shadow in any way, it’s simply made up.  I could find those types of things in anyone’s life, especially if I am making assumptions about what they must have thought years and years ago which formed the so called shadow.  I found this just ridiculous.

I think the points being made about how our thoughts and emotions can cause later problems in our lives when they are not dealt with are great but the movie talks only about how rejecting these feelings is a problem without providing any really guidance to in fact deal with them instead.  The movie tries to drive you into your own mind of suppressed emotions and does nothing but stir those up and talk as if this “shadow” can be resolved to then “let our light in our awareness” to begin processing them.  Those are the words in the movie, not mine.  That really doesn’t mean anything to me and I’m not sure how it can help anyone.  I realize there are lessons to be learned in any dark experience and that they can lead to being a better person.  The way this is outlined as the shadow with dark and light seems off base to me.  The movie references a few spiritual aspects in terms of the shadow and this is where I really disconnected.  I can’t connect to something that is describes so strongly as spiritual yet they refuse to say anything about right and wrong, or good and evil, or God for that matter.  They use light and dark instead.  It’s just a way of hiding what the shadow really is if you ask me, which contradicts the whole point of the movie. The whole movie is based on revealing those hidden truths inside ourselves that we hide from the rest of the world. The light and brilliance of hope, grace and love by God versus the dark, evil, and tempting ways of Satan.  It seemed to me they want the viewer to feel like they have exposed something great and that there is a “divine recipe”, while they don’t even bring God into the picture of dealing with these types of evils inside of us.  The movie goes into some great points on forgiveness and how it is required to move forward to shield our spirits but I just can’t believe God again, was left out of this.  Sorry, forgiveness is not in ourselves, it’s by the grace of God and his Son, Jesus.  They dared not touch any of this subject in “The Shadow Effect” though, its all left quite universal.

Another area I absolutely disagree with were the points about how you can’t hate something that you don’t deeply desire yourself.  The movie says that anything you show that you hate or detest in others is really because you deeply desire it yourself.  This is ridiculous!  I can hate evil, murder and other horrific things without that desire or even a glimmer of desire inside me.  There isn’t a perfect balance of the so called “light and dark” in every person, like the movie claims.  These balances might exist in the universe, but they certainly shifts inside individual cultures, generations, amongst turmoil and absolutely in individuals.  Can people change? Yes. Does it require outside help and intervention?  Yes.  I’ll put my faith for that in God, not myself thanks.

The movie ends without giving you any tools to change, instead its feels like an infomercial for enticing you to buy the interactive DVDs and attend “The Shadow Effect” seminar processes.  There are many inspirational messages about light and references for brilliance and happiness and while the movie is motivational, it’s not something I feel can make any lasting change for someone.  It still requires more of the process (whatever that is) to allow any change to occur.  The movie reminds me very mush like, “The Secret” for its repetitive strong message without really telling you how or what is necessary to make any the movie’s promise actually happen.  Personally, I’d say not to bother with this movie, as it just doesn’t give any real things to learn or change from.  I haven’t read the book but if its anything like this movie, I’ll save myself the time and avoid it as well.

I’d encourage you to still go check out the trailer and decide for yourself.  I truly watched this movie with an open mind and wanted to learn what was so transformational, but I personally didn’t see that and the style in which the movie teased with no real actions disappointed me throughout.

Top Articles and Favorite Posts

Armen (at Timeless Information) inspired me to build my own 100 lists ( 100 ways to be a leader and 100 Ways to Simplify Your Life and Mind ).  A few people have continued with the trend. Here were some new ones and a few I came across while browsing.

• 85 Ways to Motivate Yourself by Arswino.
• Not continued from the 100 lists, but this is a great one as well.  88 Important Truths I’ve Learned About Life
• 100 Clevel Ways to Change Your Habits and Improve Your Life – I found this stumbling and even though its not new, its a great article.
• 100 Ways to Birth your Entrepreneurial Dream at Divine Purpose Unleashed
• 100 Ways to Improve Your Blog and 100 Ways to Live a Better Life by Dragos

A few additional articles I’ve come across and really enjoyed are here:

• Sharpen Your Conversation Skills by Brian Tracy
• How to Achieve the Impossible
• The productivity magazine is a superb free resource and issue #3 is now out.
• 11 Traits of Highly Creative People

I don’t normally include videos in my content or much of my stumbling but I watched this advertisement and it is truly an amazing one.

Author: Seth Godin

We Need You to Lead Us

I recently read Tribes and its the first book I’ve read by Godin, believe it or not.  I definitely want to get into a few more of his titles now since this book had some real gems in it on leadership.  The message throughout that book is that there are many ways to connect a group of people together for a common purpose and today’s technology, especially the web enable so much of that to happen.  It allows the formation of like minded people or “Tribes” that can collectively work together and create a movement for change.

Godin highlights a few areas of why business has changed and what Tribes enable people to do now.  A few points here really stood out for me and they are about how companies expect more people to lead than they ever used to.  Leaders are expected much more now at all levels than classic organizations where only few were expected to lead everyone else.  This is encouraging to anyone to be more involved as a leader.  Another point is about, how much influence and impact individuals actually have now on areas needing leadership, new products and just the rate that business operates.  Things change much more quickly than ever before in business and this opens many doors for new leadership to exist at all levels.  The final one of these points for me was about how exciting and fun leadership and new innitiatives can actually be and that so many people want to be involved in them.  This leaves many opportunities for anyone to help collect and lead a tribe toward a common goal and common passions and aspirations.  All these points show the benefits and need for more and more tribes and Godin does a fantastic job of calling out his readers to step into these so called “Tribes” and make an impact directly.

If you are interested in leadership and new business practices and in any way wanting to expand your own influence, then “Tribes” by Godin is a worthy book.  It was packed full of good advice and great challenges to help intice you to do more than learn about it, read a book about it and understand tribes, but to actually go and get involved in them and to become more of a tribal leader yourself.  The content of this book is really packed in and condensed as well, which makes for a short read yet there are many key messages and phrases that really deliver a powerful punch to inspire more leadership. Keep this in mind as Godin leaves out any practical advice on HOW to lead or make these tribes a success, he simply puts the challenge out their and leaves the responsibility solely up to each tribal leader, just how it should be.

I definitely recommend this one to anyone looking for more leadership ideas, inspiration and simple to those who wish to explore a bit more of the social media and internet style of communities, as this is explored throughout the book.

Communication is an area that we can forever improve on and its an important area for anyone interested in personal development.  With my recent discovery about Appreciative Inquiry and looking more carefully at how to employ a new method of communication, I’ve realized there is much we do in communication that is based on habits.  These habits are often harmful and promote bad communication styles.  Most of us are trained to be advocates in our communication, that is one who argues there case, pushes what they want and seeks to find approval of that communicated message and to find followers doing so (Oh ohhh…, that might include a few bloggers then as well!).

The One Communication Mistake We All Make

There is one mistake everyone makes from time to time in the way they communicate.  This is when we send our message instead of communicating in a way that ensures our message is in fact received.  This happens when we are impatient or not considering the other person’s perspective and we simply think that making our voice heard and our message sent is in fact communicating.  Well, it is not.  Communication is all about how you actually deliver your message and so you cannot simply send your message without knowing it is actually received.

Don’t make the mistake of sending your message simply to get your ideas out without regard for others.  Keep your ego at bay when you want to be heard and consider whether it is an appropriate time for the receiver as well as you to communicate.  Remember, if they are not going to hear it, then it isn’t worth saying.

Getting Past Being Right

The next mistake often made in communication is that of having to be right.  Many of us just love to be right and it is a conversation and healthy communication killer.  If you do not stop to listen to other perspectives and accept new ideas in the way you communicate, this having to be right habit will surface often and it a tough problem to break.  Trust me, I know from experience.  I can’t say I’ve broken this habit myself but its something I’m much more aware of and I do notice it and stop myself often.  If you simply state that you disagree AFTER listening to another person’s angle and actually ensuring you understand it, you can still debate things in conversation but if you have a habit of telling someone else how they are wrong, you can immediate kill the conversation.

Criticism

Criticism for some people is very easy and its often the first thing on your mind when you hear other people’s ideas.  I think this is closely related to the bad habit of having to be right and this one comes more subtle but even more dangerous because often it isn’t even founded in anything.  Being critical and voicing it often comes very easy to most.  Its a way to express creative ideas but unfortunately, when it is delivered as critism, it is often a power trip for a creative mind to show their creative powers over another’s idea.

All three of these bad communication habits lead to adversarial communications and they can harm your relationships with other people.  Be aware of these in your conversations and look to eliminate these bad habits by replacing them with good communication habits.  Listen more than you speak, try to actually understand what others are telling you before debating it and don’t tell them they are wrong or make generalizations about people with words like always and never.  Keep your criticism at bay and do your best to keep conversations going by showing interest in others, inquiring more about what they want to talk about and by staying open minded of other’s ideas.  These steps will help you practise good communication techniques and can lead you away from the bad habits that bring upon adversarial communication.

Author: J. Barry Griswell and Bob Jennings

An Unconventional Guide to Achieving Uncommon Business Success

The Adversity Paradox is a fantastic business book.  It looks at how obstacles and setbacks in life (adversity) can create the experience a person needs to overcome such challenges and development themselves to improve their circumstances and prepare themselves to be better equipped in the future.  It’s a book with stories and a close examination of what are the main contributors to people overcoming tough circumstances in life to be successful.  It specific looks at this paradox of how great challenge and some times suffering can lead to so many later great things.  There are a number of factors in those challenges that if handled well allow a person to overcome it and turn things around.  This of course is not something that happens to everyone, but those that do overcome the paradox seem to have a lot of similarities and understanding them and learning from them allow each of us to better prepare for adversity and to achieve more.

Business Savvy

The book first looks at the term business savvy and explains it as those who understand how to do well in business, consistently achieve their business goals and to be proficient in the realm of business.  This is something you develop through practice and experience and there are a number of core competencies of a business savvy profile:

• Systems and linear thinking: Big picture perspective with ability to execute smaller consecutive tasks
• Continuous thinking: Having forward or visionary skills to steer and react quickly to future events
• Synthesizing: Able to turn data into meaningful and useful information
• Knowing what you don’t know: Seeing gaps, working to fill them through learning and through the help of others
• Communication: Solid skills to communicate at all levels
• Empathy: To recognize and understand the thoughts and feelings of others

“And Then Some”

Throughout the book the stories are shown to have each of the characters practicing an over arching theme where no matter what is expected, no matter what the circumstances and no matter how difficult something is, you should always work to go above and beyond which is described and doing the task or job “and them some”.  Always that little bit more.  Each of the characters practiced the idea of “and them some” and it continually payed off, not immediately, but eventually, it always payed off.  This is big contributor to overcoming these challenges.

This concept is put forth as a universal one where you can practice “and them some” in anything you do, which I personally think is a great message on its own in the book with or without the paradox of adversity.  If you gain anything from the book at all then I hope it is this concept since it is so simple yet so effective. I can’t stress enough how powerfully this is portrayed in the book and the chapter on “and them some” is easily worth the price of the book alone and I’ve already gone back several times to re-read pieces as it truly is brilliant!

Next, this chapter expands to look at the concept of “and them some” in a general sense of self improvement and outlines in text and pictures two main steps.

The first step, that any adversity has two options:

1. Wallowing and pessimism
2. Acceptance and analysis

It takes a step to progress from 1 to 2 and this is the key to overcoming adversity.  Move from 1 to 2 quickly and then get into the next main step of the self improvement process.

The second step requires using introspection (more on that below) to look specifically at the other human capital components to identify what can be done to better oneself.

Human Capital

1. Introspection

This is the practice of observing and evaluating oneself to assess your personality, goals, performance, ideas, capabilities, strengths and weaknesses.  This skills collides with our egos and so an honest assessment is very difficult and this skill takes time to hone.  One cannot truly assess the other human capital components until this skill develops.  However, it must be conducted with the help of what the authors call, “mirrors” or other people who can honestly provide feedback about our character and human capital components.  This understanding helps us grow and realize what we need to change to direct our efforts to improve ourselves.

2. Values

This component outlines the values and beliefs a person has.  What is it that they are founded in and can rely on for extended periods through their life. Matching your behaviors then with these lasting values is what allows you to stay consistent and stay on purpose through your career.  Doing what is right and good is outlined as an important factor to success and moral leadership is hinted at as something that defines true success.  I love that and I definitely agree with the authors that this component ought to have a spiritual foundation where the values steer a person towards a purpose in life and that only living that purpose can deliver true lasting happiness.  Ahh…

3. Work Character

It just keeps getting better and I particularly loved this component as its one that I have changed a lot with (my own introspection) and so now I value this component a lot to how it has impacted me personally and in my career.  Anyway, work character is outlined here as how committed and hard working you are.  Of course it goes deeper than that and to me its a lot about the attitude you have when it comes to work as well and its an easy place to practice the “and then some” concept from above.

4. Purpose and Passion

This one connects with work character because to have a good attitude about work while consistently working hard and always putting in a little more than expected, you really need to love what you do.  You need to find a way to enjoy your work and be passionate about it.  One line from the book that I think deserved far more attention is this piece of great advice:

The trick is to view work as a means to far greater benefits or enjoyment.

This is just brilliant and I hope that you take a minute to really think about that and your own work.  I personally can find joy in my work easily and be passionate about it because of that statement above, not always the work itself.  I find it troubling that people always say they work 1/3 of their lives so you need to love your work as its the majority of your life.  I hate that message and its really not true anyway.  People only work 17% of there entire lives so there is clearly much more to life than work.  Let your work feed your passions and bring your passions and purpose into your work, not the other way around!  Anyway, back to the book, purpose and passions are obviously important to have included in your work and they are definitely an important component in this human capital outline from the book.

5. Thirst For Knowledge

And the fifth component wraps this up well with a look at learning.  How appropriate as the enitre book is about changing from adversity and improving oneself to have business success.  This thirst for knowledge and the power of applying knowledge is transformational and can keep you on an upward success trajectory for life.  Life long learning is obviously something I write about often, I completely feel the same way about it as the authors and I too, have had that shift in my life where I realize life long learning is now a given for me, not some kind of band wagon I am on.  This type of realizating and the transformation it brings can be sparked by overcoming adversity through knowledge but its more than it, it feeds life long change, powers you to be excited about doing what you are asked “and then some” and it keeps you looking for more and more areas of introspection and building your work character.  Knowledge brings on curiosity and these thigns are absolutely essential to great business success.

Summary

So, I don’t have much criticisms about the book.  Personally, I thought that 80% of the content was packed into the first few chapters and the second half had lesser value but overall, the stories and expansions in the second half of the book certainly added more understanding and were still well worthwhile reading.  The first half is simply brilliant and I know I will be recommending this to more people and re-reading sections of it again.  The concepts and messages are realistic and can be applied whether the adversity is experienced first hand or not.  The book states, there are no secret insights, quick success steps or other tricks or promises, its straight forward and offers accounts from those tested with adversity to put those misfortunes to good use and gain business savvy from them.

I certainly learned a lot from the book and as you tell from this review, I loved the content and the message of the book so yes, I definitely recommend it to anyone interested in business success or really, any level of self improvement since the patterns can be studied and learned from in any area of life.