January 29th 2005
Genre: Business & Investing
Author: Dale Carnegie
A great book about how to improve your communication skills with others and how to influence and control your relationships in a positive way. This book is a basis for hundreds of more recent books for controlling oneself in a positive manner towards others and yourself to make an impact on your life and the life of those around you. Its a must read and provides a great framework for practicing and developing an attitude for a quality life. Here’s a little more detail about what the book covers:
Part1: Interacting with and handling others
The main points here are to learn not to criticize others, ever. Be honest in your communication and give others feedback. And finally, learning to stir up a desire and want in others.
Part2: Ways to make others like you
One important way taught here is to focus on the other person. Everyone loves to hear and talk about themselves, so if you do that, that person will naturally like you. Being genuine in your interest of others is critical here to show some care and sincerity. Other techniques as simple as smiling can also make a big impact. This can all be assisted by great listening skills, another key to make others like you.
Part3: Interacting with and handling others
Main points here for me are to avoid always trying to be right. Never tell someone else they are wrong. Learn to listen to others ideas and always consider things from their point of view. Build on others ideas and make sure they know it is still their idea, don’t replace it with your own. Be friendly and polite, and admit when you are wrong to show your own vulnerabilities.
Part4: How to change people safely
Safely means without causing resentment or pain to others. Don’t attack others ideas, don’t directly point out mistakes. Let people admit their own or realize them without an attack and be first to point out your own mistakes. Most importantly, give feedback continually for many, many little things. Encourage the good stuff and give adjusting feedback on the bad. Keep others interested by having them own their ideas, and to have their own desire and wants. Give them reasons to be happy to make the changes or do what you want.